Post by Placidfemme on Jan 7, 2004 17:37:45 GMT -5
:femme: [glow=red,2,500]25 REASONS I'M GLAD I'M A DYKE
By E.L.
1. Who gives a damn if the toilet seat is up or down?
2. If I were to get a tongue stud, it'd make someone
else other than myself very happy.
3. Bull/Dagger/Butch/Tomboy/Diesel Dyke are
compliments, not insults.
4. Flannel shirts are back in fashion.
5. I can't accidentally wedgie myself since I wear
boxers and not knickers.
6. Preparing for a date just means a thorough shower
and a clean shirt.
7. I don't need chocolate to keep me happy.
8. Flowers are things that grow in gardens, not on my
clothes, bedlinen or soft furnishings.
9. I am more macho than many of my male friends.
10. Putting my fist through an inanimate object or
through my tormentor's face is a perfectly valid
response to provocation.
11. I've got the Indigo Girls, k d lang and Melissa
Etheridge to identify with.
12. I don't spend my youth poring over wedding gown
catalogues or dreaming of a white-and-gold wedding.
13. I speak two extra languages: soccer and Black and
Decker.
14. Dogs and other tomboys, not diamonds, are my best friends.
15. My wardrobe does not contain anything in peach or
pink or any strange, frilly, lacy clothes with strange, frilly appendages.
16. I go to bed in pretty much the same clothes that I
lounge about the house in.
17. All I need to be well hung is to have long
fingers.
18. I get aroused watching Xena kick seven shades of
shit out of the bad guys.
19. I can tell a bandsaw from a jigsaw.
20. Tears aren't my weapon. The car steering lock and
my Swiss Army Knife are.
21. Spaghetti belongs on my plate. It is not something
I wear.
22. Girls kiss better.
23. I can neglect to put a condom on my dildo and my
girlfriend will not get pregnant.
24. And neither of us falls asleep right after sex.
25. Two words: Multiple Orgasms
Nicole D. Woodard[/glow]
